The Time Bubble Box Set 2, стр. 26
It didn’t help that his mind wasn’t eighteen anymore, it wasin its mid-fifties. People changed as they got older and what had seemed likethe best night out ever at the time now just seemed like an immature waste oftime.
These sobering thoughts weren’t enough to physically soberhim up, but they had provided plenty of food for thought to discuss with theothers on his return. Going back to being young again sounded hugely appealingon paper but, as he was learning tonight, it might not be quite the Holy Grailthey had envisaged.
Would life be better for people second time around? Possibly– but what about the fifth time or the fiftieth? Would people ultimately becomejaded by it all?
“Hurry up in there!” he heard Dan shout from outside. “Whatare you doing, having a dump?”
Josh turned away from the mirror and made his way back out.
“Come on, finish this – if you can,” goaded Dan. “We need toget to the Old Craphole.”
He was referring to “Ye Olde Chapel”, a former monasterywhere monks in the seventeenth century had brewed their own beer. Now it waspart of a chain of cheap and cheerful pubs, with historic exteriors, but allidentical inside.
There was still plenty of beer onsite, but it wasn’t madelocally anymore. Most of it was mass-produced and shipped in from a warehousein Swindon.
During the week the pub fulfilled various functions from animpromptu crèche for mums with pushchairs, to the local Darby and Joan club forpensioners who couldn’t afford to eat anywhere else.
At this time on a Saturday night it was packed with groupsof young men wearing too much cologne and women wearing too much make-up. Mostwere out on the pull.
Tonight was no exception, and the pub was extremely crowdedand noisy. It wasn’t appalling music that was the problem this time, though.This chain of pubs had a strict no music policy. Instead it was the chatter ofhundreds of voices echoing in the cavernous room that Josh found uncomfortable.It reminded him of the background noise at the local swimming baths when theywere crowded.
It took forever to get served. The bar was packed six deepand it was a serious challenge to pick the right spot and attract the attentionof a server. This was a skill that the somewhat timid Ryan was yet to acquire.He may have been tall, but he didn’t have the confidence to go with it, and thebar staff in this pub were not renowned for serving people in turn.
If Josh had hoped the delay would help sober him up a littlehe was mistaken. The noise and crowds all around him just made him feelclaustrophobic, and he again began to question why he was putting himselfthrough this ordeal. The middle-aged mindset inside him wished he was at homewith Alice having a cup of tea and watching the telly.
He checked his old school Casio watch to see that it wasnearly 10pm, so he only had another couple of hours to endure.
While he was waiting for the pint he didn’t want, he felthis phone vibrate in his pocket and pulled it out to reveal a message fromLauren.
Fancy a shag later?
This was all he needed, a horny Lauren to contend with,especially after what Alice had said before he left. Thankfully, according toKaylee, she was safely out of the way in Oxford, so he could afford to textback in the affirmative. He would be long gone by the time she got back.
Sure, come round when you get back.
He quickly had cause to regret this reply as Lauren’s replypinged back seconds later.
We’ll be back sooner than you think! Oxford’s boring sowe’re getting the 11 o’clock train back. Hope you’ve done your shopping!
Bloody hell, why was it everywhere he went in the multiversethere was always a version of Lauren trying to pounce on him? This hadn’t beenpart of the agenda at all. He was sure Lauren and Kaylee hadn’t come back thisearly the first time around. Then again, it was forty years ago and he had beendrunk, so he couldn’t really be expected to remember all the details.
Catching the train at 11pm meant they would be back in townwell before midnight. He also knew exactly what Lauren had meant by hershopping remark. It was a little private joke between them which basicallymeant had he bought any condoms? Lauren might have had extremely loose morals,but she was extremely strict when it came to safe sex.
He hadn’t done his shopping, despite telling Dan otherwisein The Marlborough Arms. Why would he? The last thing he needed was anothersexual encounter with Lauren in the past. He’d never be able to look Alice inthe eye again.
Eventually Ryan did manage to order the beers and beganpassing them back through the crowd. This was a strategy fraught with danger asthe lively Saturday crowd was heaving and the possibility of a drink being knockedout of someone’s hand was high. This would lead to a smashed glass on the floorand the traditional moronic cheer from all within earshot.
Josh decided to take advantage of the situation anddeliberately bumped into a couple of people, sending an inch or so out of thetop of his glass and all over the carpet both times. It wouldn’t make muchdifference to the carpet which was distinctly sticky underfoot from years ofspillage.
He got separated from the others in the crowd, but fightinghis way away from the melee around the bar, he spotted them on the far side ofthe room where they had gathered around one of the fruit machines.
Ben was eagerly feeding the machine which was based on theold Deal or No Deal TV show, egged on by Dan and a couple of the others.While they were distracted, Josh seized his chance to pull Charlie away tospeak to him in private.
“Have you heard from Kaylee?” he asked.
“Yes – they’re coming back,” said Charlie. “I told them tomeet us later.”
“Can’t you put them off, or say we’re going home