The Time Bubble Box Set 2, стр. 24
The place was full of kids who, when they weren’t stuffingtheir faces with as many chicken nuggets as possible from the all-you-could-eatbuffet, were running past Josh and the others to the soft play area and ballpool. These were a recent addition, replacing the pool tables and dartboardswhich had previously occupied the space but no longer fitted in with the pub’starget demographic.
They didn’t linger long, heading next for The CarpentersArms, which was the first pub in the actual town centre. It was in an old,Tudor-style, listed building which still stood in Josh’s time, though by thenit had become an upmarket bistro. It wasn’t a place he and the other lads hadfrequented in their youth, being seen by them as a place for old fogeys.
When they arrived, the regulars were enjoying listening toan old-fashioned folk singer as they supped on their real ales. There wasn’t apint of lager in sight as the group of eight young lads crashed in, rudelydisturbing the peace.
“What’s this crap?” asked Dan, loudly enough for both thesinger and the landlord to hear. “Why haven’t they got the footie on?”
“Shut up, Dan!” protested Charlie. “Do you want us to getserved or not?”
“Ryan, do the honours,” commanded Dan, bossing his youngacolyte around as usual. “Eight pints of lager, on the double. That’s if they’veeven heard of lager in here.”
“What the hell did we have to invite him for?” said Josh toCharlie.
“He invited himself, remember? We tried to keep it secretbut he wheedled it out of Ryan.”
As soon as Dan had his lager in his hand, he rounded on thelandlord, a nervous-looking man in his late-sixties with an old-fashionedhandlebar moustache.
“Where’s the telly, mate? I take it you have got one?”
“We don’t, actually,” replied the publican, wishing theobnoxious loudmouth would shut up. “There’s not much call for it in here.”
“Did you hear this, lads? They haven’t even got a telly!Unbelievable!”
Josh felt incredibly embarrassed by Dan’s obnoxiousbehaviour. He probably hadn’t really noticed when he really was eighteen, butwith the benefit of maturity, it was unforgivable. All he could see was a groupof perfectly affable senior citizens enjoying a bit of a singalong with theirfriends, being made to feel uncomfortable by this rude, ignorant oaf.
“Cool it, will you, Dan?” said Josh. “You’ll get us thrownout.”
“Who’s going to throw me out, these sad old gits?” scoffedDan. “I’ll have finished my pint before they can even get out of their chairs.”
“Let’s go out into the garden,” suggested Ryan, attemptingto defuse the situation. “It’s a nice night.”
“Excellent idea,” replied Josh. At least it would get Danaway from the other customers.
Crisis averted, they went out into the courtyard at the rearof the pub and got on with necking their third pints, but Josh was alreadystruggling by the time he was halfway through his. This couldn’t be right –he’d only had two and a half pints and he already felt decidedly unsteady onhis feet.
Had Dan doctored his drink in some way? Or was it just hisbody’s tolerance levels? His older body was accustomed to several decades ofdrinking alcohol, but this youthful model wasn’t used to it. He was alsodesperate for the loo.
“Charlie, can you hold onto this for me a minute?” he said,handing his pint to his friend as the others bantered away. “I just need to nipinside for a slash.”
Unfortunately, Dan overheard, and broke off from acompletely fictitious story he was telling Ryan and Ben about a non-existentSwedish girl he was claiming to have shagged on holiday. Most people realisedit was utter rubbish apart from these two who were gullible and lapped it allup.
“Oi, have you heard this, lads?” he exclaimed. “Josh herecan’t hold his beer. He’s going for a piss already after three pints. What apussy!”
“Shut it, Dan,” hissed Josh, feeling increasing anger risingwithin him, which he was struggling to keep a lid on. This young body wascertainly full of fire. Just as with the alcohol, he also seemed to be at themercy of whatever hormones might be raging through his physical body, and hisolder, wiser mind was fighting to keep control.
Suppressing a strong desire to punch the idiot, he went tothe toilet and found the blessed relief he sought in the urinal. When hereturned to the garden the others had finished their pints, with the exceptionof Charlie, who was nursing his to give Josh some moral support.
“Better?” asked Charlie.
“Better,” said Josh, wondering how the hell he was going tomanage all eight pints. No wonder he hadn’t made it last time. The way he wasfeeling right now he was amazed he had even got to the seventh pub.
“Get a move on, you two, we’ve all finished,” said Dan whothen started chanting, “Down it, down it!” Much to Josh’s disgust, all of theothers apart from Charlie joined in, leaving him no choice but to knock it backwhich made him feel distinctly queasy.
He didn’t have long to recover as the next pub, TheMarlborough Arms, was a mere fifty yards down the street. It was ratherappropriately representing Marlborough Street, one of the orange properties onthe Monopoly board, and would mark the halfway point of the journey.
This pub was extremely crowded, which enabled Josh tosneakily dispose of half of his pint in a plant pot.
“I hope you like lager,” he said quietly to the large rubberplant as he surreptitiously poured his drink into the surrounding soil. Couldplants get drunk? he idly wondered. This one seemed to be thriving and heprobably wasn’t the first person to treat it to a drop of liquor.
Getting rid of half a pint gave him a bit of