Wolf: SBMC Maryland, стр. 33
“About what?” I ask not knowing what it is she wants with me. She nods toward the corner of the room and reluctantly I follow her. “What’s this about?”
“I have a friend; she works in child welfare. She’s a loudmouth. Tells everything she knows,” she says rolling her eyes. I cross my arms over my chest wondering where the fuck this is going. “Anyway, I saw Krista, watching that little girl.” Fuck! I don’t need her in this shit too.
“Whatever the fuck you think you know, forget it. All of it!” I growl loud enough to catch the attention of some of the other guys around us. Sugar flinches.
“It’s not like that. I mean, I asked my friend about her. Gave her the address and all.” Fury rips through my chest. I take a step back and drop my arms, raising one hand to point at her.
“You say one more motherfuckin’ word and you’re out!” Turning on my heel, I’m about to walk away when she screams, “Lauren knows about her!” My eyes come to lock with Krista’s, but she doesn’t know what the hell we’re talking about. I turn back to Sugar, grab her arm and drag her out of the side door. Slamming her body against the wall, I get right in her face.
“What the fuck did you do?”
“Nothing, Wolf. I just asked a few questions but then Lauren saw me talking to her. She got in the middle of it all.”
“And what the fuck did Lauren say?” I nearly growl at her. Sugar trembles but that doesn’t stop me. The side door opens, and Krista walks out with Dez. Just what the fuck I needed.
“What are you doing to her, Wolf?” Dez asks stepping closer.
“Mind your own fuckin’ business, Dezzy.”
“Fuck you. Don’t you dare start that shit,” she snaps at me, but my focus is on Sugar.
“What the fuck did she say?”
“Leave her alone, Wolf,” Krista says this time. I ignore her too.
“She just said that she would make some calls. That they’d know she was coming around her.” I step back as the world slowly spins around me. This could be bad for Krista. This could put her in jail. There’s no way she found out where Eva had been living without doing it illegally. Running my hand through my hair, I look away from all of them. I hear Dez take Sugar back inside and I can only hope that Krista went with them. As I lower my head, I know it didn’t happen, I can see her boots as she stands in front of me.
“Getting your dick hard with the club girls?” She asks. Although her tone sounds playful, I know she isn’t joking.
“Not what you think,” I tell her without looking up.
“I don’t really know what I think anymore, Wolf.” Now I do look up. My eyes collide with hers and there’s a standoff. Both of us are warring with what’s in our heads and hearts.
“You know what I think? I think what I told you was true. I think you’re scared to let me love you, Krista. You hide behind that little girl. You hide behind your baggy ass clothes, but you can’t hide your fuckin’ heart from me!”
“What am I supposed to do? Huh? Just give up on everything I’ve cared about?” Her eyes are haunted as tears pool in them, but she doesn’t see what’s right in front of her. Damn her!
“No, not everything, Krista! Just what you can’t have. You’re fuckin’ givin’ up on me and I don’t deserve that shit. I deserve more than that!” With that, I walk away from her before I do something I might regret. I don’t want to hurt her. I just want her to see what’s right in front of her. Fuck, I just want her to see me.
“That isn’t fair!” I turn to look at her where she stands behind me.
“Nothin’ in life is fair, darlin’. Nothin’.” I shake my head not knowing what else to say to her. I can’t make her understand me. I can’t make her see that I love her.
“I don’t know who I am anymore, Wolf. If I don’t have her to watch over, what do I have?” The tears fall and as much as I’d like to go to her, hold her, I can’t do that.
“You have me, Krista. You need me to keep tellin’ you that? I can, every fuckin’ day I can tell you that you have me but if you can’t see that for yourself, there is no point in this,” I tell her pointing between us. More tears fall but this is it. I can’t make these choices for her anymore. I can’t force her to be with me. Instead of holding her, hugging her, I walk away.
As soon as I round the building, I jump on my bike and get the fuck out of here. I need space. I need to breathe, and I can’t do that around her. She fogs my head up. She crosses my mind more than I care to admit and that frustrates the hell out of me. I know I’m not the best person in the world but fuck, I am a good guy. Or at least I think I am.
It didn’t take me long to make it to the bar and order a shit ton of drinks. I’m good and wasted when she walks in. The thought of taking her in the bathroom and choking her to death has crossed my mind but she serves a bigger purpose.
“Didn’t think I’d see you here,” she says letting her hand trail from one shoulder to the other.
“Me either.” Taking down another shot, I try to ignore the rage simmering inside of me. She would hurt Krista just to get back at me. I know she would.
“Can I sit?” I nod my head because frankly, I don’t want