Risky Rockstar: A Hero Club Novel, стр. 62
Kade stills. “Fuck! Hayley, did I hurt you?”
I shake my head. “No, I’m okay.”
Kade shifts and gathers me into his arms. I feel his rigid length against my hip and know that if I’m this frustrated, he must be too.
“You’re crying. That’s not a sign that everything is okay.”
“I’m sorry. This is supposed to be our first time together.” I wave my hand. “Outside of the time we were interrupted. It’s supposed to be perfect, but…” I hesitate. I don’t want him to see me differently. Like I’m defective.
“It’s okay, please don’t cry. Hayley, look at me. It’s really okay. Just tell me what’s wrong.”
I cry even harder because Kade is being unbelievably sweet right now.
“Hayley, baby, please, talk to me.”
I stare at my fingers. At the nails I just had painted today with mini guitars on them because I can’t look Kade in the eye right now. “Sometimes…” I take a breath, unsure of what to tell Kade—that I’m not the sex symbol everyone thinks I am—but Kade puts his thumb under my chin, and his eyes give me all the encouragement I need to speak up. “Sometimes it takes me a long time to come. I get stuck in my head, and I can’t, you know. I don’t want you to think it’s you because…” I blush and look up at him from under my eyelashes. “You’re fucking incredible.”
He chuckles and pulls me tighter. “Incredible, huh? I’ll have to put that on my resume.” He shifts again, and I realize I’ve been rubbing up on him. “But seriously, I get it. I do. And I don’t think you’re alone in this. I think a lot of people struggle with the same thing.”
“You must be so frustrated. Let me help you…” I move so I can continue sucking him off, but he tugs my arm gently and tips my chin.
“If you don’t come, I don’t come, okay? A case of blue balls isn’t going to kill me.” He winks.
I turn to face him, staring into his gorgeous eyes. “It’s not you. Please don’t think it’s anything you’re doing.”
I lean against his chest, and he wraps his arm around me and we talk for hours. I tell him about the things Ethan said to me and why I get stuck in my head. I don’t want to bring him in the bedroom with us, but the words just spill from my lips. He tenses when I tell him Ethan told me I was frigid.
“Sounds like you did the right thing by removing yourself from his life. Hayley, I want you to know there’s no pressure between us.”
We kiss for hours. I can feel he’s turned on, and I am too. Every sweep of his tongue makes me want to ask him to be inside me again, but I can’t. I’m too scared I’ll fail again. Eventually we fall asleep, me in Kade’s arms. Everything is perfect. Except one thing.
And it’s my fault.
Chapter 29
Hayley
I jerk out of the water and slam my finger on the Stop button. I do not need to hear a sex scene in Jacob Morgan’s voice right now. I’m currently listening to one of my favorite audiobooks by Lesley Peppers, and I know exactly what is about to happen, and with the way I’m feeling right now, I do not need any reason for my fun parts to combust. As it is, I’m so turned on my fun button feels twice the size and is zapping me with tiny electric pulses. Sexual frustration is freaking killing me right now.
God, I wanted to come. I wanted Kade to make me come. But as always my head got in the way, and now, I’m dangling on a precipice of perpetual horniness. I settle back against the tub, and bubbles lap at my breasts, the water brushes against my nipples, and even that is too much to bear. I feel it in my clit as the water gently strokes me. This is too much. I need the release. My fingers move to my nipples almost of their own accord, and I squeeze each bud between my fingertips. A jolt gets me right between the thighs, and I squeeze my legs together.
The friction hurts more than offers comfort, and I know I’m at the point of no return. I have to get off, and I have to get off now. I move my hands over my soap-slicked belly. Everything is heightened and feels so damn good. I think of Kade’s warm hands brushing over my body, the way his long fingers caressed my skin like the keys of a piano. I see the leather straps at his wrists. I feel his lips on my neck, the way he kissed me along my jaw till he got to my ear.
My fingers brush over my sensitive flesh, and I moan so loudly, the sound bounces off the bathroom walls. The steam vapors around me, cloaking me in a mist of desire. God, I’m pathetically poetic when I’m turned on. It takes some doing, but I don’t touch my clit yet. I’m way too worked up for that, and I’m worried I’ll get to the point where the sensations are too intense and I won’t get to come again. This happens to me a lot, and when it’s just me and my fingers—or toys—I can ease off or go for it depending on how my body feels. When it’s someone else, I’m often too distracted by what they are doing and the sensations they are causing for me to immerse myself in the moment.
Last night with Kade was different. He made me feel amazing, treasured, and the things he