Mr. Big Jerk: A Forbidden Second Chance Romance (Kinda Cocky Series Book 3), стр. 39

“So, someone was captured.”

He slowly raised his head to look at me. “Yeah. Bryce was.”

I swallowed hard. “Bryce had been captured?”

He nodded. “By the enemy. He was on a mission with another SEAL team to recover some stollen weapons and ammo, and he got spotted. Took us damn near five months to track him down, but we finally got to him. And things were supposed to be simple, Roxy. We were supposed to go in, take out the guards, get Bryce, and get the hell back to the nook.”

I cupped both of his cheeks. “What happened, Clint?”

His eyes watered. “They came out of nowhere, Roxy. Dozens of them. Men, screaming at the top of their lungs while spraying bullets everywhere they could. I mean, they didn’t even have a target. They didn’t care who they picked off, who they killed, or whose blood they spilled. All they wanted was to take out as many of us as possible.”

“I’m so sorry, Clint.”

His arm started trembling around me. “I picked off as many as I could. I swear I did. I kept my men close as we ignored the women and children gurgling on their own blood around us. It was hell on earth. I’ll never forget the young girls reaching out for us, begging us to rescue them.”

“Why couldn’t you?”

He shook his head slowly. “Always focus on the mission. Nothing’s more important than the mission. That’s what they teach you, and that’s all I understood. All I knew was saving Bryce. All I knew was getting him out of there. Because of that, women and children died that never should have understood the horrors of war in the first place.”

I felt my own tears dripping down my face. “My God.”

“All of that, for nothing. All of that death, for a failed mission. By the time we got to Bryce, he was already dead. Covered in nothing but red. His body had been flung onto another soldier’s. Almost as if he were trying to protect someone. It’s funny, that’s so like Bryce. Giving whatever he had to in order to save someone else. It’s what made him such a good SEAL. It’s what made him such a good friend, Roxy. And he’s gone. He’s gone because I couldn't get there quickly enough, and I let dozens of women and children die in the process. For nothing but a failure.”

I turned his head toward me. “Clint, none of that is your fault.”

“How can you say that?”

I gazed deeply into his eyes. “You didn't kill Bryce. You didn’t kill those people. They did. They captured him. They’re the ones that did this.”

He sniffled. “Then, why the hell doesn’t it feel that way?”

I wrapped my arms around him, hugging him close. “I don’t know, Clint. But, I do know you won’t ever have to experience this sadness alone ever again. Okay?”

He hugged me tightly. “Oh, God, Roxy. I miss him so fucking much.”

I’d never heard a grown man cry before. But that night? I not only heard a grown man cry, but I felt it, too. I felt his tears as they stained my shirt. I felt his trembling body as he held me close. I heard his hiccups and his sobs and his wheezing as his nose clogged, and he had to cough to breathe. It broke my heart. It shattered my soul. I wanted to do something to take his pain away. To help him see that he could live his life in honor of his fallen friend instead of being trapped in the memory of Bryce’s death.

“I’ve got you. It’s okay,” I whispered.

“Why couldn't I get to him quickly enough?” he sobbed.

I kissed his tears away. “I don’t know. I don’t have answers. I can’t even sympathize. But, you’re not alone, Clint. Your SEAL buddies get it. They lost him, too. And you won’t ever have to deal with this alone, because you have me. Got it?”

His eyes found mine again. “Promise?”

I smiled softly. “I promise with all my belly.”

He snickered. “It looks great on you, you know.”

“Bah, you’re just saying that.”

His eyes grew stern. “No, I’m not. Curves have never looked better on a woman. And I’ve seen plenty of them.”

I paused. “Thanks…?”

He wiped at his face. “Sorry. Fucking hell, I’m so so--.”

“Clint Hearthstone, if you apologize one more time, I swear I’ll slap you myself.”

He snickered. “Good luck. My reflexes are outstanding.”

I grinned. “That’s a promise?”

He sighed. “I’ve never told anyone about that night before.”

I straddled him. “I’m honored that you felt comfortable enough to tell me.”

“Thank you for not running.”

“Thank you for letting me in.”

He licked his lips. “How about we just put all of that food in the fridge for later and order something in? Maybe pizza?”

I kissed the tip of his nose. “Under one condition.”

“Name it.”

“We eat it in bed, and you keep telling me about Bryce.”

He shook his head. “I’d love nothing more than to tell you about him, Roxy. Because I really think he would’ve loved you.”

“Good. Then, it’s settled. You order the pizza, I’ll get this stuff in the refrigerator.”

As I stood from his lap, offering my hands to him, I helped pull him onto his feet. His arms cloaked my back, and his lips crashed against mine in a passionate kiss that stole my breath away.

“Mmm, what was that for?” I murmured against his mouth.

His forehead fell against my own. “That was for being the most amazing human being I’ve ever come across.”

I blushed. “You keep fueling my ego like that, and you’re going to have an issue with me fitting through that door.”

He chuckled. “Fine by me. Just means I’ll have to get a bigger place with a bigger door.”

“Ha. Ha. Ha.”

He patted my ass softly. “Come on. Let’s get this show on the road. I already know the first story I want to tell you.”

“Tell me while I put the groceries up, then?”

He smiled. “As you wish, beautiful.”