Mr. Big Jerk: A Forbidden Second Chance Romance (Kinda Cocky Series Book 3), стр. 20

around soon enough, because all I did for the rest of the weekend was lay around and feel sorry for myself. Oh, and I desperately tried not to think about Roxy. Every single part of me wanted to call her and see how she was feeling. Every single part of me wanted to send her flowers, or have her favorite foods delivered. A small part of me even wanted to show up with a bottle of wine at her doorstep. I mean, it wasn’t like I didn’t know where she lived, or her phone number. I had her contact information on my work phone for emergency purposes. And while I knew this wasn’t exactly a work emergency, it felt urgent nonetheless.

Still, I resisted the urge.

I mean, thinking about Roxy was much better than thinking about the fucking military. But, in my mind? It was close to the same red flag ‘danger’ warning. The second I heard my alarm blaring at five in the morning, I leaped up from the couch. I stretched my arms over my head and bent forward, feeling my back pop into place. I’d been up for an hour already, not that sleep was kind to me in the first place. If I wasn’t thinking about Roxy while I was awake, she haunted my dreams while I slept.

She and those wondrous curves of hers taunted me over and over.

I cracked my neck and stretched my arms across my chest. A good morning workout before a cool shower would do me some good. I changed into some shorts and a raggedy t-shirt before slipping into my tennis shoes, then I started out the front door.

But, during my entire run, all I thought about were the tears in Roxy’s voice.

“You’re an idiot,” I hissed.

I started out with a brisk jog for a few blocks. But, the voice in my head kept pushing me forward. Faster and faster I ran until my legs burned and my lungs heaved. It still wasn’t enough to outrun Roxy’s sorrow, though. It wasn’t enough to wipe away the memory of those tears in her eyes. Breathing air through my nose as I turned sharp corners wasn’t enough to wash away the lovely scent of her perfume, and the wind whipping around my body wasn’t enough to rid my mind of the warmth of her body sitting next to me.

“Come on,” I growled.

I leaned forward as sweat dripped down my back. I felt my shirt clinging to me, chafing my damn nipples as I sprinted across the road. Horns honked, and I flipped them off before continuing on my jog, heading back to my apartment so I could get ready for work. And the second I stepped into the cool stream of water in my shower, I began shivering.

I didn’t get any reprieve, though.

It was as if Roxy’s memory was determined to sink me.

You’ve got this. You can do this. You’ve been to war, for fuck’s sake.

If I could block out those horrid memories, I could surely block out the memory of her. As I dried myself off and got ready for work, though, my brain proved me wrong. It was as if I had posed a challenge to my own body, and it was determined to show me up.

So, this is what my stubbornness feels like.

I refused to cave, though. I refused to tap out. I gathered my things and made my way down to my car, preferring a more professional ride into work over my Harley. I cruised on into the office and took the back entrance just so I wouldn't have to run into Roxy at the front desk entrance. I rushed up the stairs and jogged down the hallway, not stopping until I was safely behind the closed--and locked--door of my office.

But, I knew damn good and well I wanted to see her too badly to stay there all day.

“All right. Distraction time,” I whispered.

I walked over to my desk and powered on my computer. I saw a stack of files on my desk already that required my signatures, so I plucked a pen from the cup holder on my desk. I didn’t sit down, though. Instead, I picked up every file and paced my office, reading over the information before signing off on it. I chewed on the tip of my pens and scratched my name onto dotted lines, completely forgetting about the fact that I had logged into the official system that connected everyone in the building together.

And when my laptop began ringing up a storm, I rushed over to it.

“Come on, are you kidding me?” I murmured.

I set the files down and wiggled my hips as I hunched over the keyboard. I chased the warning signal around, trying to figure out why the hell the system was acting as if it had an intruder. I checked the log-in files to see if there were any unauthorized code usages, but there weren’t any. I checked the backlogs to make sure no one was trying to hack into our network, but I didn’t see anything worth any sort of concern. Then, I found it—the reason for the warning sounds.

“What the--?”

I squinted my eyes as I clicked on Roxy’s name. And sure enough, she had typed her password in wrong on four separate occasions. Now, that woman knew damned good and well that she couldn't enter a wrong password that many times before it signaled--.

Oh.

I shook my head as my fingers stroked against the keys on my keyboard. I got the dinging to stop and reset her attempts at her password, then turned my attention back to the files at hand. If she thought she could get my attention that way, she had another thing coming. If she wanted me, she could come up to my office.

Says the man who took the back stairwell.

“Fuck off,” I hissed to myself.

I finally sat down in my chair for the first time since getting into the office, but I couldn't sit still. I kept