In the Wrong Hands, стр. 25

Father Leo swallowed a sigh and spoke reassuringly.

“Go on.”

“I picture myself in Heaven looking down upon him and smiling as his soul burns eternally in Hell.”

“You want him to go to Hell then?”

“Oh yes, Father!  With every fiber of my being I do.  I’ve also had the desire to hurt him myself.”

“How so?”

“I want to kick him.  I want to tie him down and hit him with something hard like a stick.”

“Do you want to kill him?”

There was silence.  He could tell she was searching for the most righteous answer.

“No.  Of course not.  I just want to help deliver justice in some…” more searching “…way.  A humble way.”

Father Leo continued hoping the fiftieth time would be the charm.

“You know that’s not how it works.  Only God can pass judgment like that.   No matter the circumstances, He doesn’t want us to wish harm on each other.  It’s our job to live our lives as Jesus did.  Jesus wasn’t just the Son of God; he was an example.  God could never show himself to us in his true form, so he sent down a piece of himself to set an example.  Do you think Jesus is happy when another one of his Father’s children goes to Hell?”

“No.  I suppose not.  Thank you, Father. I understand now.”

She didn’t.

“Also, just for the record, picturing yourself in Heaven is almost as bad as picturing someone else in Hell.”

“I understand.”

Nope.

“Is there anything else you wish to confess?”

“I made three pies for the capital campaign last Friday.  I said I would make four, but I decided to keep one for myself.”

And everything was back to normal.  Constance began the wrap-up.  Dr. Phil was on in twenty minutes.

“Sorry for all these sins and the sins I cannot remember.”

“I don’t think you need to worry about the pies, but for the act of hubris, say five ‘Our Fathers’ and try to remember that he who exalts himself shall be humbled and vice-versa.”

“Thank you again, Father.  Sorry for my sins with all my heart.  In choosing to do evil, and do not do well, I have sinned against you whom I should love above all things.  I firmly intend, with your help, to do penance, to sin no more, and to avoid anything that leads me to sin.  Amen.”

“Your sins are truly forgiven.  Go in peace.”

“Thank God.  Oh, and Father, I got a good picture of the Bishop after Mass last Saturday.  Let me know if you’d like me to send it to you.”

Mrs. Henderson was a piece of work, but not, by any means, unique.  For some folks, especially those generationally set in their ways, the broad picture was just too broad.

She’s a good soul.  The salvation is in the attempt, not the…

“Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.”

Leo didn’t even hear him enter the confessional.  He didn’t recognize the voice.

“It has been a long time since my last confession.  I don’t remember exactly how long.”

“That’s okay.  What are your sins?”

There was a disturbingly long pause.

“I’ve done…horrible things, Father.”

“Involving what?”

The entire box creaked as it did when a person shifted their weight on the bench.

“My sister.”

Leo’s face tightened.

“What happened?”

“I’m not a freak!”

Father Leo’s voice had a magical calm to it.

“It’s okay.  Ba assured.  You’ve come here.  That’s a very good start.  God forgives the penitent, but you have to confess your sins out loud.”

The box creaked again as the man moved his face to the latticed opening.

“You know, you spend your life with a person, and then one day you’re in the pool, and you’re swimming, and she’s sunbathing, and the sunlight catches her just right, and suddenly you realize you have an erection.”

Leo heard a soft, slow thumping as though the man was beating his head against the wall behind him.  The anonymity could only be broken as a last resort, and Leo didn’t feel it had gotten there yet.

“I’m not going to insult your intelligence by telling you that what you described isn’t a sin, but there’s a big difference between having an impulse and acting upon it.”

“But I did act upon it, Father.”

Leo could feel his eyebrows meet.  There was no creaking.  The only sound in the confessional was the man’s labored breathing.

“Did you…have sexual relations with her?”

The man let out some kind of hiss.  Leo sensed that he touched a nerve and braced himself for the answer.

“No, I didn’t.  I wanted to, but I didn’t.”

“Then you did the right thing coming here.  Have you sought thera…”

“But I did masturbate right in the pool.”

“Oh, I see.”

“Then I hid a webcam in her room and masturbated more.”

“You did?”

“I mean a lot…and everywhere.  I spanked it in my room.  I waxed it at school.  I cranked out a few out in my car.  I even shot one in the parking lot of a hotel.”

“Okay, okay.  God knows the details.  Have you sought therapy?”

No answer.

“Look, if you are truly sorry and are willing to repent, God will forgive you, but you should also talk to someone.”

Leo waited close to a minute.  The confessional creaked again…then, again.

“Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.”

A woman’s voice.

What the…?

Leo pulled the curtain back and looked out into the sanctuary.  It was empty.

Hold on…shot one in the parking lot of a hotel?

He sat back with a jolt.

“Carol…I mean…my child, did you see the man who was in here before you?”

Leo suddenly felt as if a helicopter was about to take off in his chest.

“Uh, not really.  He was tall, but everyone looks tall to me.  He had on a wool hat, so I couldn’t see his hair.  He walked out facing the wall, so I couldn’t see his f…”

“Did you see where he went?”

“No.  He was walking towards the back of the church, but I don’t know if he was walking to the offices or the side exit. Was two weeks since my last…”

A Bishop gets killed two days earlier, a man runs out of confessional in a wool hat being very careful not to let his face be seen,