Shameless (The Therapist #2), стр. 22
Most men would crumble beneath the pressure of trying to satisfy Ava’s appetite for sex. It’s part of the reason things didn't work out between her and Lucas. She wanted more in the bedroom, and he wasn't capable of providing it. She was too much for him, but it wasn't just in the bedroom. Ava was too much for Lucas all around, so he had to run away just to escape the breathtaking fog that emanates off her. It takes a certain lung capacity to breathe Ava in, and I thought I’d be able to do it. Maybe I was wrong.
Maybe it’s me who’s ruining things. Ava and I started fucking while she was still my patient, so it’s arguable that I was the one who crossed the line. I knew my attraction to her was purely sexual, and I thought that would be enough. It turns out, however, it might not be enough for me. I know she has a spell over me because I’m addicted to fucking her, but the more time we spend together, the more I realize that sex is literally the only thing that connects us.
I thought that something else would've grown between us by now. I thought I'd have feelings outside the Black House. I thought I’d want more from her than to watch her come. I thought she’d show me she could bring more to it than that, and I thought I'd want to give more than just my cock and pleasurable pain. With all of this in mind, maybe it’s me who’s messing up the flow by having expectations that are too high.
All of it gives me a headache, which is why Excedrin isn't doing a damn thing today. My temples throb like there's a drum being pounded on both sides of my head, and as I sit at my desk and open up Tessa Milton’s file, it only gets worse. Maybe it’s the brightness from the computer screen or the thoughts of confusion swirling around in my head. Nonetheless, I need to get it together, because when it comes to my patients, I have to always be on top of my game. They don't get to know that I struggle with the same things they do. To them, I know my shit, full stop.
I take a minute to get my thoughts in order before Tessa shows up. She’s a beautiful woman who’s been through a lot with her ex-boyfriend, who I always thought was a real piece of shit. Now that things between them have ended, Tessa is trying to find her way out of the maze of societal opinions and judgments. It can be a tough task, especially when you've gone your whole life constantly doing what other people expect you to do.
My goal for Tessa is to help her break out of that, but it’s hard to convince someone that the opinions of other people don't matter. In today’s society, we’re constantly flooded with the opinions of other people. Social media makes this ten times worse than it should be, and even if the comments and opinions are from random people that we don't even know, they still affect us. Breaking that cycle is a must for Tessa, just as it is for most of the people in the world.
After a few minutes of jotting down notes for my session with Tessa, I feel ready to get my day started. I stand up from my seat and stretch out, and even take a second to walk over to the couch my patients will sit on and straighten it out for them. I fluff the pillow and make sure the box of tissues on the table is filled up. Once everything is in order, I go back to my desk and wait for Keisha to tell me Tessa has arrived.
Instead of Keisha over the intercom, the next sound I hear is Keisha’s voice through my door. She sounds agitated as she raises her voice, and then my heart drops to my feet as I hear another voice that I recognize. Ava’s.
“You can't go back there, Ava,” Keisha says. I can tell she’s trying to remain calm, but she’s pissed. “Ava, Dr. Colson has an appointment in ten minutes. This is not the time.”
“He’s my boyfriend, Keisha,” Ava fires back. “I’m not a patient anymore, and I’m allowed to go see my boyfriend at his job. Stop being jealous and tell him I’m here. Or, I’ll just go in myself. It’s not like he keeps the door locked.”
“Ava, you can't do this,” Keisha retorts, but Ava doesn't care, and I’m stunned when the door to my office flies open. Standing there in dark purple leggings that hug her thighs and put her glorious ass on display, is Ava. She’s sporting a black shirt underneath a purple and black jacket, with her hair flowing down behind her back. She looks furious at first, but when she sees me, her fire dies out, and she smiles.
“Hey, baby,” she says, as if she didn't just burst into my office ten minutes before I have a patient.
Fuck.
Chapter Sixteen
~ Malcolm ~
“Umm, Ava, what the fuck?” I whisper, almost to myself but loud enough for both women to hear me.
“Hi, babe,” Ava replies with a smile, as she casually walks across the room and leans in to kiss me on the cheek. It’s like everything moves in slow motion as Ava lifts herself to her tippy-toes and pecks my face. I look over at Keisha, and she looks like she’s ready to fight both of us. She glares at Ava for barging in, and at me for letting her.
“Ava, what are you doing here?” I