Once Forbidden, Twice Tempted (The Sterling Wives Book 1), стр. 26
“It’s just us in this room. You can at least give me a hug.”
“Honestly, I think a hug will make this more difficult.”
Tara choked back a sigh and shook Grant’s hand. “Got it, boss. I’ll see you in a little bit.” She leaned against the doorway as he strode down the hall and escaped into the stairwell. The sound of the front door closing a minute later confirmed that he was gone.
Tara wasn’t sure what she was feeling right now. Regret came to mind, but as for what she wished she hadn’t set in motion, she wasn’t sure. Had this idea to bring the wives together and shoehorn themselves into Sterling been a stupid idea? Or was Grant the poor choice? She didn’t want to slap that label on either of her decisions, but she knew that she couldn’t have it both ways. She couldn’t have this powerful new job and Grant. And since she knew that her compatibility with Grant in bed was zero predictor of anything beyond sex, she needed to get back on track. She needed to get back into Astrid’s good graces.
After throwing on a pair of yoga pants and a light sweater, Tara grabbed a cup of coffee and went out to the balcony. Astrid was reading something on her phone, but she quickly tucked it inside her purse.
“Sorry about that,” Tara said.
“I saw Grant leave. I decided to be discreet and not yell goodbye.”
“Thanks.” Tara curled up in the chair next to Astrid. “Last night was a mistake. And it won’t happen again. I told Grant as much. I think he and I had some issues to work out. Stuff from before Johnathon and I were together. But it’s all over now. I don’t want you to worry about it. I’m also hoping we can count on your discretion.”
Astrid sipped her coffee, staring ahead at the ocean. “Sure. As long as I get the right job within the company.”
There was no mistaking the implied threat. “Of course. Grant said he’d call you this afternoon and you can start on Monday. It looks like we’re moving ahead with the Seaport Promenade project, so hopefully you can be involved with that. We can work together on it.”
Astrid smiled, which made Tara feel slightly better, although she still wasn’t sure she could trust her completely. “Sounds good. I’ll look forward to hearing from Grant.”
“Everything else okay?” Tara asked.
“For the most part, yes. I spoke to Miranda yesterday.”
“You did?” Tara wished she didn’t sound so flabbergasted, but she was.
“I called to see how she’s doing.”
“That was nice of you.” Honestly, it was astounding of her.
“I don’t want things to be so strained between us.” Astrid tucked herself farther back in the chair. “I’m sure this sounds crazy, but it feels like she’s one of the only connections I have to Johnny. I’m having such a hard time coming to terms with his death.”
They were each struggling in their own way. “That makes a lot of sense. She was certainly more connected than most of us when he died.”
“And she was there when he passed. I can’t explain it, but I feel tied to her. Also, I’m trying to tamp down my envy over the baby. I told myself that if Miranda and I became close, maybe it would help me be more purely happy about it.” She took a sip of her coffee. “I also talked to my therapist over the phone earlier this week. She helped me through some of this.”
Maybe I need to talk to a therapist, too. Tara admired Astrid’s willingness to be kind to Miranda. It had to be difficult for her. But it also confounded Tara a bit. Between the pregnancy and the revelation that Johnathon had not told Astrid he’d married a third time, Tara had only envisioned those two having problems. And she couldn’t help but think about the unstable nature of a group of three people sharing the same interest. Alliances would naturally form, and if the one between Miranda and Astrid became especially strong, that would leave Tara out in the cold.
“Is that crazy?” Astrid asked. “Telling myself that getting close to Miranda will make me less jealous?”
It was then that Tara heard the utter heartbreak in Astrid’s voice. It was clear as the morning air, and just as strong as the sun. The loss she felt over her inability to conceive with Johnathon was still front and center. It might follow her for the rest of her life. It was only natural that she’d seek some way to come to terms with it. It was certainly a healthier approach than living in denial, or worse, allowing herself to be angry.
Tara set aside her coffee cup and leaned forward in her chair, reaching for Astrid’s hand. “I don’t think it’s crazy. I think it’s admirable. I think it’s very big of you to set aside your own hurt and support Miranda right now. Frankly, I need to do more to reach out to her and see if she needs anything.”
“I’m sure she’d like to hear from you.”
Tara let go of her hold on Astrid and sat back. “Maybe the three of us could have dinner one night. That could be fun.” She could hardly believe what was coming out of her mouth—the idea of the three of them seeing each other in a social setting of their own planning would have been entirely implausible a few weeks ago.
“I like that idea. Plus, it’ll give me something to do.”
“I’ll get going on that. I’ve just been so distracted this week.”
“By Grant?”
Tara shook her head. She’d made a huge mistake by letting the heat between Grant and her get in the way of the goals she had with Sterling and the promises she’d made to the other wives. In many ways, her conversation with Astrid only confirmed how far she’d strayed off the path