Mayhem & Mistletoe, стр. 42
He was unruffled. “It’s still better than the alternative.”
“Not if, once she comes back crying, Duncan and Marvin decided to console her. I bet one of them tries to use his penis to do it.”
Fish’s mouth dropped open. “I can’t believe you just said that.”
“Oh, please. I’ve said way worse ... and this week.” I refused to let him break eye contact. “I have information I need to track down today. I can’t have her dragging me down. She needs to be someone else’s responsibility.”
“Do you have any suggestions?”
I would’ve preferred someone chain her to a desk and force her to write obits, but I knew that suggestion was likely to result in me getting stuck with her. “Marvin will say goofy stuff. He won’t be aggressive. He’s a good reporter. Tell her you need to spread the wealth.”
Fish didn’t look convinced, but he ultimately nodded. “Fine. She can go with Marvin ... but just today. You’ll have to put up with her trailing you again at some point.”
That was a problem for a different time. “That’s fine. Now, do you want to be the one to tell her where she’s spending the day, or should I do it?”
“I’m the boss.”
That did little to sway me. “I’ll do it. You’ll just screw it up.”
Fish’s glare was pronounced. “I can’t tell you how I love our little tete-a-tetes. They’re just so gratifying.”
“I know. I’m all sorts of awesome.”
“I was being sarcastic.”
“And yet look what I heard. That’s why I’ll explain things to Sabrina. I’m in charge now. Just sit back and let me do the heavy lifting. I’m good at it.”
“If that’s what you need to tell yourself.”
15 Fifteen
Sabrina didn’t take the news that Marvin would be her mentor for the day well. She complained, whined and made me realize my decision to never have children was the right one. I had to lie to get her to back off ... which was fine with me, because she was unbelievably annoying.
After leaving the newspaper office, I stopped at Eliot’s shop. My cousin Mario continued to work shifts for him even though he was training a new worker on the night shift. Because he was related to me, Mario’s personality sucked up most of the oxygen in the room.
“There she is.” Mario beamed as I entered. “How’s my favorite cousin?”
“Suspicious,” I answered without pause. “What are you up to?”
“What makes you think I’m up to anything?” Mario was the picture of innocence. Er, well, as innocent as an overweight guy with back hair issues in his early twenties could look. “I’m helping your boyfriend in a time of crisis. That indicates I’m the good one in this family right now.”
“Yeah, you keep telling yourself that.” I let myself into Eliot’s office without knocking. I didn’t miss the annoyed look on his face when he glanced up. “Has the love already died?”
His frown disappeared almost instantly. “I thought you were Mario. He’s driving me crazy.”
“I warned you when you hired him.”
“You thought it was a good idea.”
“For him. That food truck he runs with Grandpa doesn’t make money when it’s cold. I never said it was good for you.”
He ran his tongue over his teeth as he regarded me. “Have I ever mentioned what a joy you are to me?”
“Several times.”
“I’m not feeling it today.” He went back to staring at his computer. “Not that I’m not glad to see you — and for the record, I’m kind of not glad at this particular moment — but what are you doing here?”
“Yup. The love is definitely gone.”
He pinned me with a dark look. “Talk.”
“I was hoping you’d come up with something for me to chase.” There was no sense lying ... unless I could genuinely benefit from it, of course. “I’m in the mood to dig but my options aren’t all that exciting.”
That drew a smirk. “I just saw you an hour ago. What sort of information do you think I’ve managed to dig up?”
“I don’t know. You’ve convinced me in the past that you’re a miracle worker. And you came up with Ray.”
He shook his head. “I’ve been going over the books since I separated from you. Did you know Mario tried to pick up a teenager with a tiara he undersold from my stock yesterday?”
The conversational shift threw me. “How did you find that out?”
“I checked the cameras when I realized the tiara was gone.”
“He gave it to her?”
“He sold it to her for half price. He said that since it had been sitting in the shop for a year, he thought he was doing me a favor.”
I agreed with Mario — and yet I didn’t want to tick off Eliot in case he decided not to help me — so I nodded, hoping I looked sympathetic. “Total bummer.”
He continued staring at the monitor. “You don’t care.”
“I care.” That wasn’t remotely true. “I just don’t understand why you care about a tiara. It’s not as if it had real diamonds.”
“No, but this was a collector’s piece from one of those high-end teenybopper shops.”
“But it sat here for a year.”
“More like eight months. Prom season is coming up. I figured it would sell again in the spring.”
“So, take it out of his paycheck.”
“I don’t want to do that.” He made a face. “He’s a young guy trying to get by.”
“You’re a giant softie.”
He pressed the heel of his hand to his forehead. “Have I mentioned that your family gives me constant migraines?”
“And yet you want to join yourself to them forever.”
“I want to join myself to you forever.”
“We don’t need to be married to do that. We can just keep living in sin.”
He studied me. “I’m not having this fight right now. I know you’re trying to get me to explode, and maybe somehow agree with you, which would result in me letting you off the hook. That’s not going to happen. I’m getting my way this