Compounding Traumas (Artemis University Book 6), стр. 60
I shrugged. “Then handle it however. That’s really the only answer you have.”
“Are you sure you’re a light fairy?” Richardson sputtered.
I shrugged again, swallowing my true answer and theory. “I wasn’t raised with them and their influence, but instead, some of the darkest parts of humans. I would bet they won’t think me much like them either.”
“I did not mean it like that, Ms. Vale,” he muttered, sounding truly apologetic.
“I am who I am, and I’m proud of the woman I am. It took a lot to get here. If they don’t accept me, they won’t be the first, or the last, and I’ll survive.” I thanked White and left the room as if nothing we had said bothered me and I simply didn’t want to get involved in the boring adult details if I couldn’t have my way.
But that wasn’t the truth at all. I didn’t want to risk White busting me on my lie, as the fairies not accepting me would destroy me, and she was powerful enough to see through my aura-dulling rune. Plus, the light fairy side of me screamed to dole out justice and handle the rampant corruption we never could seem to focus on because we had to protect me.
Because protecting me meant protecting all the fairies I was trying to save. There was no finding them, or answers, without me, so justice had to wait a bit longer.
And that killed me. It ate at me. I put what was right on the backburner over my safety. It was hard to remember it was to save my people and the big picture. It was hard to remember that a lot as people I cared for were going to be the first hurt in the crossfire, and if I’d handled that corruption and justice, they wouldn’t be.
Gods, just give me more time to get the answers before it all blows up in my face. All I need is more time.
16
“If you are reconciling with these two, then there are somethings you learned this summer you need to inform them of,” Irma lectured me, moments after I arrived home with Darby and Lucca. She started to turn red when I stared at her, opening her mouth as if to blast me.
“I don’t disagree,” I hurried to say as I held up my hands in surrender. “I just don’t know what you’re specifically referring to in the vast everything I learned. Irma. There was a lot. There’s always a lot.”
“She’s right, Irma,” Ryfon chastised gently. “Tamsin is kind and warns people when she knows she should. It is not her fault she doesn’t always know what to share and what is secret.”
Irma sighed, reached out and squeezing my hand. “I wasn’t angry with you. I hate how—your life should not have been this hard, child. You are such a good soul, and you have suffered too much. You are so closed off for a fairy because of all the pain and betrayal you have suffered. I hate it. It makes me so angry that this has been your life, but I am never angry with you.”
That wasn’t completely true as there had been a few times she’d been rather miffed with me. Mostly when I’d been difficult, but once Mel had explained to her a bit more about my childhood and how I’d been abused, Irma had realized it wasn’t my being a brat, but true issues. Now she got upset for me.
It was still hard for me as a fairy to be around the hobgoblins when they were upset.
“I’m speaking of the demons,” Irma elaborated.
Darby snorted.
“Do we believe in demons?” Lucca muttered.
“No, they’re nothing but myth and legends, like vampires not being able to go out in the sun and my not having a soul,” Darby stated with complete certainty.
“I’ll make sure there’s some of Melody’s beer with dinner,” Irma said, her tone amused.
Darby raised an eyebrow at that and glanced at me.
I sighed and sat at the table, my stomach happy at least when I saw there were appetizers for us to start in on. “She’s saying you’re going to need a drink or six because I’m about to burst your bubble.”
He smiled at me as he took the seat next to me at the head of the table so we were also at an angle. “Agra, there’s lots you don’t know about our world yet and can easily be explained—”
“Darby, there’s lots you don’t know and the fairies didn’t tell anyone. Ever. Not ever, except other fairies or fair folk,” I said firmly. I nodded when he pressed his lips together. “They’re real, and they sent a group to warn me to stop trying to open Faerie and to leave things alone the night of my summer soiree.” I gave them the quick version of what had happened, leaving out my upset and fleeing from Craftsman.
“It’s a lot to swallow, Tamsin,” Lucca admitted.
I snorted. “Really? I had to wrap my head around all of this, and supes in general, and you guys are completely certain I’m off my rocker, or totally missing something, to believe this.” I gave Darby a look that I dared him to deny it since I had my telepathy turned on and could hear him.
“I’m sorry,” he sighed. “It’s simply one of those things that we know to be true. Demons don’t exist.” He flinched when all the hobgoblins in the kitchen burst out laughing. “You all know? You saw the ones Tamsin spoke of? Or you simply trust her that much?”
Half the hobgoblins turned red, but Irma knew him pretty well and didn’t get angry at his prickly side. “I wasn’t there to see them that night, but we’re fair folk, and fairies don’t hide much