Longing for You, стр. 50

“I can hear it.” Amelia was amazed. She’d done it.

“Good, now thank the ancestors.”

“Thank you.” Amelia did feel a bit strange thanking something shecouldn’t see.

“Now open your eyes, but keep that channel open. Breathe and staycalm.”

Amelia did that and stayed focused. “It’s hard work.”

“Magic is hard—that’s why not everyone is capable of it. You mustpractise every morning in quiet meditation,” Magda said.

“Will I be able to call for the Grand Duchess or my mother?”Amelia asked.

“If you practise, you have the capacity to do anything, Amelia.”

* * *

Katie finally finished for the day. She made her way upstairs andmade a beeline to Alexis’s room. They needed to talk after earlier today—plusAlexis hadn’t fed from her since this morning. Before they left the New Forestthey’d agreed that Alexis would only feed from her, so Katie assumed Alexis haddrunk bottled, and she’d be hungry.

Bottled Debrek Special Reserve and blood bags did the job in apinch but were never as satisfying. Katie always got a little thrill at thethought of feeding Alexis. It was something that meant so much to her. To bethe one providing what Alexis needed fulfilled a need she didn’t know she had,plus it turned her on.

She approached Alexis’s door and shivered at the thought ofAlexis’s teeth in her. Katie knocked at the door and Alexis soon opened it.

Katie smiled. “Hi.”

Alexis was tense. “Come in.”

At the beginning of the week, they were jumping on each otherafter being apart for the day, but now the old stiff Alexis was creeping backin. Whatever was causing this, Katie had to fix it.

She walked in and looked around Alexis’s old-fashioned room. Theyhad been staying in Katie’s room, so this was her first time seeing Alexis’sspace. It hadn’t been refurbished in years and was cold and unwelcoming with nofamily pictures or artwork.

“Okay, what’s wrong? You’ve gone from sweet, loving, and hot Alexisto worrisome and tense in days. What’s going on?”

Alexis sat on her bed and clasped her hands tensely. “I don’t knowhow to cope with this.”

Katie was starting to worry now. Alexis appeared overwhelmed withemotion. She wasn’t going to run away from their love, was she?

She kneeled in front of Alexis. “What can’t you cope with?”

“You, loving you and worrying about you is paralyzing me. I wasdistracted today when I should have been guarding Byron, and she noticed.”

Katie sighed and took Alexis’s hands. This again. How was shesupposed to get Alexis over this fear of losing her, like she had done thefirst time love had claimed her heart?

“I was only going shopping, not going for a night out at TheSanctuary,” Katie said.

“But I need to know you’re safe all the time. The stress isoverwhelming. For all I knew you could have been dead, lying in a ditchsomewhere.”

“Oh, don’t be silly, Alex,” Katie said. “I went to a few shops,then back home.”

“I’m not silly,” Alexis said with frustration. She pointed out thebedroom door. “Not long ago I found you nearly dead on the landing out there. Iwas so frightened today that my team and the Principe noticed how distracted Iwas, worrying about you.”

“I’m sorry, but love is frightening in any circumstance. I promiseto always take care and not take chances. You have to be brave to take the lovethat I’m offering you,” Katie said softly.

She was scared about what Alexis’s answer might be.

Alexis shook her head. “I told myself never to get involved with ahuman again because of this. I’m immortal, you’re mortal. Byron is lucky—herblood bond and the Grand Duchess’s ring make Amelia immortal.” Alexis’s voicecracked. “I’m going to have to watch you die, and I can’t deal with that.”

Katie put her head on Alexis’s lap. What could she say? It feltlike this could break them, and Katie loved Alexis too much to let her go. ButAlexis was right—Amelia was lucky. She was now as immortal as Byron was.

Byron wouldn’t have to watch Amelia grow old and die, and Katiedidn’t want Alexis to live with this fear. She would do anything to give Alexisthat security. She thought of Alexis holding her first lover Anna as she died,and tears sprang to her eyes. Katie couldn’t let Alexis feel that pain again.

Katie looked up at Alexis and said, “I don’t want you to gothrough what you did with Anna. I want to transition, Alex.”

“What?” Alexis said with surprise.

“I want to become a vampire. I want to live by your side as longas you do.”

Alexis stood up immediately. “No way.”

“What do you mean no way?” Katie said.

“I mean no way are you giving up your mortality for me.”

Katie stood up and approached her. “Alex, it’s not just for you. Idon’t want to live with the fact that I’m going to cause you so much pain,”Katie said.

“No,” Alexis said angrily.

“I consent. You have my consent. I mean, you were going to changeme when Josie nearly killed me.”

“That was different,” Alexis said. “You were in immediate danger.I’m not doing it, Katie. You have no idea what you have to give up. It’s not adecision you should take lightly, on a whim.”

“But, Alex—”

“No.”

Katie was frustrated. “I’m not taking it lightly. You forget thatI was torn back from the hands of death already. I know how it would feel.”

Alexis started to pace up and down. “You don’t know—you had aglimpse at best. Your parents would be horrified, and they’d blame me forinfluencing you.”

“Stop treating me like a child.” Katie stopped Alexis and put herhand on her chest. “I can make the decision for myself.”

Alexis looked her in the eye. “No, okay? No.”

Katie had enough. She grasped Alexis’s wrist and bit into it hard.Alexis pulled her wrist away, but Katie already swallowed her first gulp.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Alexis said angrily.

“Making the decision for you.”

“No, you’re not. You can’t complete the transition unless you diewith my blood in your system, and I’m not going to kill you, and I doubt you’lldo it yourself.”

Katie said nothing. She knew she couldn’t take her own life.

Alexis looked furious. “I can’t believe you did that. Do myfeelings mean nothing to you?