Pride and Prejudice and Kitties, стр. 5
“Certainly not.”
“To walk three miles, or four miles, or five miles, or whatever it is, above her ankles in dirt, and alone, quite alone! what could she mean by it? It seems to me to shew an abominable sort of conceited independence, a most country town indifference to decorum.”
“It shows an affection for her sister that is very pleasing,” said Bingley.
“I am afraid, Mr. Darcy,” observed Miss Bingley in a half whisper, “that this adventure has rather affected your admiration of her fine eyes.”
“Not at all,” he replied; “they were brightened by the exercise.”
To all this, she must yet add extensive napping.
POOR JANE CONTINUED to feel very low. She hid in the back of the closet and was not even up to batting around a crumpled piece of paper that Elizabeth discovered under the fender. Consequently, Mrs. Bennet and her two youngest kittens descended upon Netherfield to visit Jane. It was decided that Jane would stay on until her condition improved and the apothecary ordered some succulent chicken pill pockets, for Jane preferred these to the nasty salmon-flavored ones that Miss Bingley had procured from the cook.
“I do not know a place that is equal to Netherfield,” remarked Mrs. Bennet, as she entered the breakfast parlor. “You will not think of quitting it in a hurry, I hope, Mr. Bingley, though you do have but a short leash.”
Meanwhile, Lizzy spotted a mouse and pounced on it.
“Lizzy!” cried her mother. “Remember where you are, and do not run in the wild manner that you are suffered to do at home!”
The cats then compared the merits of country life to living in town.
“The city,” observed Mr. Darcy, “has fat, tasty rats as well as mice.”
“I assure you,” retorted Mrs. Bennet, “there is quite as much of that going on in the country as in town.”
Mr. Darcy merely gazed at her and commenced licking his paw, and Mrs. Bennet fancied she had scored a triumph.
Lizzy spotted a mouse and pounced on it.
They then discussed the efficacy of cheese versus grain in trapping mice.
“I have been used to consider cheese the very food of entrapment,” said Mr. Darcy.
“A fine, stout Stilton may be,” said Elizabeth. “But a mild low-fat cheddar may chase a mouse entirely away.”
Before they left, Lydia, in high animal spirits, reminded Mr. Bingley of his promise to give a dance with plenty of balls. He replied that he would, just as soon as Jane’s fur fluffed up again, and Lydia could name the day.
“The country,” said Darcy, “can in general supply but a few subjects for such a study. In a country neighbourhood you move in a very confined and unvarying society.”
“But people themselves alter so much, that there is something new to be observed in them for ever.”
“Yes, indeed,” cried Mrs. Bennet, offended by his manner of mentioning a country neighbourhood. “I assure you there is quite as much of that going on in the country as in town.”
Every body was surprised; and Darcy, after looking at her for a moment, turned silently away. Mrs. Bennet, who fancied she had gained a complete victory over him, continued her triumph.
. . .
“Aye—that is because you have the right disposition. But that gentleman,” looking at Darcy, “seemed to think the country was nothing at all.”
“Indeed, Mama, you are mistaken,” said Elizabeth, blushing for her mother. “You quite mistook Mr. Darcy. He only meant that there was not such a variety of people to be met with in the country as in the town, which you must acknowledge to be true.”
“Certainly, my dear, nobody said there were; but as to not meeting with many people in this neighbourhood, I believe there are few neighbourhoods larger. I know we dine with four and twenty families.”
WHEN ELIZABETH CAME downstairs after dinner, she began to chew on some embroidery, being careful not to get a needle stuck in the roof of her mouth, as had happened to a cat of her acquaintance.
While this was going on, Miss Bingley swatted Mr. Darcy with her paw, harassing him as he tried to compose a letter to his sister. Mr. Bingley observed that Mr. Darcy did not write with ease; he studied too much for words of four syllables. (Darcy was fond of a dictionary, but he sprawled on it even more often than he looked into it.) Mr. Bingley on the other hand always walked carelessly across his letters while the ink was still wet, blotting them horribly.
“Everything I do is done quickly,” trilled Mr. Bingley, attacking a dormouse scurrying across the floor.
Darcy and Bingley proceeded to spar over the merits of pouncing quickly versus reflecting first. Bingley observed that Darcy always got the upper paw in these disputes.
“I assure you, that if Darcy were not such a magnificently tall tom, in comparison with myself, I should not pay him half so much deference. I declare,” said Mr. Bingley, “I do not know a more awful object than Darcy, on particular occasions, and in particular places; at his own house especially, and of a Sunday evening, when he has nothing to bat about.”
I do not know a more awful object than Darcy at his own house especially, and of a Sunday evening, when he has nothing to bat about.
Miss Bingley and her sister then caterwauled a duet and Elizabeth could not help noticing how often Mr. Darcy’s eyes were fixed on her. When Miss Bingley varied the charm by a lively Scottish-fold air, Darcy drew near her.
“Are you not tempted by the lively music, Miss Bennet, to join me in unraveling a fishing reel?”
Elizabeth declined, and Mr. Darcy really believed that were it not for the inferiority of her cat connections in London, he should be in some danger.
“I hope,”said [Miss Bingley], as [she