Risky Rockstar: A Hero Club Novel, стр. 71

Freeing.

Kade’s reaction wasn’t quite what I expected—instead of that sexy smirk I’d expected, he looked like he’d seen a ghost. A horrific ghost. Now, it’s me who feels like I’ve seen a ghost.

The elevator ride seems to go on forever, but thankfully I’m alone. I dig into my purse and pull out my sunglasses. Eventually, I reach the lobby and exit, the relentless tears streaming down my face blurring my vision and causing me to bump into people as I race through the lobby. Their indignant cries do nothing to drown out the memory of Kade’s groans as he stroked himself to release.

I pull my floppy hat down over my face, grateful I have my sunglasses on. I don’t care if people think I’m lame wearing sunglasses inside—as long as they don’t know who I am, that’s all that matters. I inhale through my nose, fighting the wave of nausea as it threatens to overtake me. Just a few more minutes. Five minutes tops and I’ll be in my car and driving away from here.

The valet steps up in his navy uniform seconds after I burst through the door. He doesn’t even blink at my disheveled appearance and tearstained face as I hand him my keys. Although, I think my disguise might have something to do with it. That, and the fact that I’m sure these guys see everything. I gnaw on my cuticles as I wait impatiently for him to come back with my car. I know it must only be minutes, but it feels like years.

I feel him seconds before his hand curls around my bicep. Kade’s voice, soft and filled with pain, cracks as he speaks. “Hayley, wait, please.”

I turn to look at him, grateful to see he had the foresight to pull his ball cap over his head even if his shirt is inside out. I don’t say anything because I can’t. Pain has my tongue locked in my mouth. He lifts his cap, running a hand through his hair before setting it back on his head. “Can we talk?”

I shake my head. “I can’t.”

Kade drops his hand and takes a small step back. Shoving his hands into his pockets, he nods and looks at his feet.

I’m so ashamed. I can’t bear to meet Kade’s eyes. I threw myself at him tonight. God, I even cuffed myself to the bed. Offered to have him splay me open for him. All but begged him to fuck me, and he looked at me with the same look of horror he has on his face now. No wonder he rejected me without so much of an explanation only to go and jack off.

I can feel the flames of humiliation lick at my skin. I don’t need to see the red blotches to know I’m glowing a fiery red. I feel so exposed standing here. I’m about to lose it when the valet saves the day by driving up in my car.

I don’t meet Kade’s gaze. “I have to go.”

“Hayley. Please, just let me explain.”

I smile sadly at him. “It’s pretty self-explanatory, Kade.”

“It’s not what it looked like. Fuck!” He drops to his haunches, his head cradled in his hands. Looking up at me his eyes plead with me. “Hayley, please.”

“I have to go!” Tears spill from my eyes. “Please, Kade. I need to go.”

I climb in behind the wheel. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t face him. I close the door and inhale a shaky breath. Willing myself not to break down.

I round the lavish driveway and head into traffic. I know I shouldn’t, know it’s stupid, but I steal a glance at Kade in my rearview mirror. He’s sitting on the curb now, gulping in air. I flick my gaze back to the road, blinking back the tears.

I can’t believe this is happening.

It’s one thing to have someone as vile and putrid as Ethan hurling insults at you, but seeing someone as warm and attentive as Kade turn those words into actions hurts like nothing I’ve ever experienced. I just want to get as far away from here as I can. I don’t know what else to think.

All I know right now is if Ethan’s words were a scar, Kade’s actions are a white-hot branding iron to the heart.