Love and Sorrow (Small Town Secrets Book 5), стр. 67
Maybe I had the wrong house.
Pulling the phone out of my pocket, I doublechecked. This was the right house, all right.
Unless, of course, Bernard Buckley had moved as well as left his job. But the mailbox next to where I was standing still had Buckley painted on its side.
My breathing was far too heavy, and I was wishing I hadn’t left my cigarettes in the car. What a shitty job I’d do if I couldn’t stop my fucking hands from shaking. I took a few slow breaths in through my nose and out my mouth, holding them for a few seconds in an effort to slow the thudding of my heart.
At last, though, I forced myself to move toward the house. I froze on the sidewalk, questioning what the hell I was doing. But then I let it all back in—Sarah’s words, all the horrific things my child had described. As I visualized everything that monster had done to my daughter, I felt my blood boil again inside my ice-cold body, and my heart began beating faster. The adrenaline started coursing through my veins, and neither courage nor determination was a question any longer.
I walked up the two steps onto the porch. A small jack-o-lantern sat next to the door, the flame inside flickering, making its triangle eyes and jagged mouth seem almost unreal. I felt almost like I wasn’t in my own body as I watched my hand press the doorbell button. Whatever had been inside me turned numb and cold, allowing my instinct to take over.
Once more, the older woman opened the door. Try as I might, my mouth wouldn’t open. The woman finally said, “Can I help you? You’re not here for trick or treat.” Her smile was tentative, ready to disappear at any second.
Finally, I managed to answer while I felt around for the gun in my jacket pocket. “Does Bernard Buckley live here?”
The woman stood hidden behind her screen door with a large bowl of candy in her hands. “He’s my son, but he doesn’t live here anymore.”
As my hand clenched the gun in my pocket tightly, I muttered under my breath. “Motherfucker.”
I hadn’t thought she could hear me.
“I beg your pardon?”
Feeling helpless and angry, I imagined shoving my way in, forcing Buckley’s mother to tell me where he was. Allowing the animal inside to take over, I reached forward for the handle to the screen door just as a hand grabbed me around the elbow.
I turned around to see none other than Justin. When I whirled back around to face Buckley’s mother, my courage slipped away. If I didn’t do this now, I’d never be able to.
“Come with me.” Justin’s hand tightened on my elbow, but I kept my eyes locked on the woman in front of me. Again, I wrapped my fingers around the gun, my index finger feeling for the trigger. Justin put a hand on my shoulder and forced me to turn away.
“What do you people want?”
Justin led me down the block to my car. The numbness I’d felt earlier was changing to nausea and lightheadedness. He kept an arm around me, holding me up as much as he was leading me.
Soon, he helped me sit in the passenger side of my car and drove. Suddenly, I felt completely wiped out. It wasn’t long before we were walking up the steps to his apartment and then I sat in silence on the couch until I had to run to the bathroom. The soup I’d eaten earlier was coming back up with a fair amount of stomach acid and bile. When I left the bathroom, I was wiping my mouth with a tissue, but my hands were shaking.
Handing me a glass of water, Justin sat next to me on the couch. He hadn’t said a word since pulling me away from the Buckley house. I asked, “Why did you stop me?”
“You know why.”
“He should die.”
“Randi, you’re not the goddamn judge and jury of the world. He’ll get his due.”
“Bullshit. They’ll let him go free. I know it. He’s not even at his home anymore, so they won’t even find him.”
“He’ll get what’s comin’ to him. You gotta believe that.”
“I don’t gotta believe shit, Justin.” My breath might have been quiet, but my voice was full of fire. “I don’t have to.” Suddenly, soft sobs forced their way out of my mouth as a torrent of tears dropped from my eyes. “I don’t.”
“Before I met you, I might have agreed with you.” As he pulled my head to his chest, I gave in to the sorrow inside, falling into his arms.
* * *
It was dark when I awoke, and it took a few seconds for me to realize I was lying in Justin’s bed next to him, my shoes off but the rest of my clothes still on. I was in his arms and tried to adjust my body into a comfortable position so I could go back to sleep.
But I heard soft noises in the living room.
For a few moments, I tried to convince myself that the sounds were coming from his neighbor’s apartment—but when I opened my eyes, the dim light coming through the doorway told me otherwise. “Justin. Justin.” I kept my voice as low as possible, but I sat up in case I needed to shake his shoulders or something else to wake him up.
“What?”
“I think someone’s here.”
“What?”
“Listen.”
We